I want to testify about God's mercy that comes to my life.
For about three to four months ago, actually my left eye that previously had blurred was able to read short message without magnifying glass. Even, I could read the text on the newspaper at close distance. But, I was negligent.
I felt doubtful to testify it although the Word often said that we inventoried small testimonies.
Consequently, God made my left eye return to blur like previous time.
But I thank God for giving me opportunity to testify something that looks small and I do not want to be negligent anymore.
Since last year, I struggled to God that He returned the things that had been lost from my life, both ministry and the function of my senses. Unexpectedly, the Word for New Year's Eve Service was about the year of Jubilee. It was told that in the year of Jubilee, God would return the things that had been lost from our life. And it became my power.
The firstwas about driving license. My driving license was expired on December last year.
As human, it was impossible to extend my driving license with the condition of my senses, even my father doubted too. But, I kept on believing that if God worked, I could extend my driving license. And if it could be extended, it meant that God had a good purpose.
When I filled the form, there was one question about disability. And here it was the test of my honesty. There was an option for hearing disability and I might pass it. But, because the Word said that we had to be honest from small things, I checked the option for hearing disability.
I did not check the option for eyes disability because there was no question about that.
I was afraid when I was called for photo session and signing my driving license, because the cop would have been able to see my unnatural eyes. But, I kept on believing whether my driving license was accepted or not, it was in God's hand.
Praise God, my driving license could be extended. One thing that people said I had lost could be returned by God.
The second, last week, I went to my customer. When he saw me, he suddenly said "your eyes are good now. It was very different when you came here in the past time".
I confused and I asked him what was so good. And he said "now, your eyes can move together both the left and the right. It could not move together in the past time". I just answered that I felt it could move since the last time. So, I thought it was not special.
But, when I met my friend to discuss about working, she suddenly said the same thing. She said "your eyes have already been good. Their motions are same. In the past time, the motion of the other was slower, but now, it can move in same motion".
I shocked and asked her "was the motion different in the past time?". And she said "I knew from the time when your eyes would be operated. And from that time, I always saw your eyes when I met you and every time I saw your eyes, I knew that you had ever got accident. And your pupil had different size. But, of earlier, when I saw you, I did not realize that you had ever got accident. Ordinary people who see you now will not know if there is something with your eyes".
From the two witnesses, I am strengthened that God has started to fix my eyes without my knowing.
From those events, God showed me if my driving license could be extended, it was because the cop did not see the unnatural thing in my eyes. It was because of God's helping. If the cop had seen different motion of my eyes, my driving license surely would have been rejected.
Then, my sister looked into my right eye too, and she said that in the past time, there had been thick membrane like cataracts in my right eye, but now, the membrane was almost clear.
And I was strengthened by the Word on Wednesday that said what I experienced was like a cloud, as small as a man's hand, it seemed to be nothing but it was incredible for me.
Medically, nothing could be done. But, God returned the motion of the eyes that had been lost in the year of Jubilee.
God also returned the part of the pupil that had been lost. And I believe, God is still able and surely ableto work until everything is finished in His time. Whatever the result is, it is the best for me.
From my experience, some of my friends praised me because I was strong and et cetera. But I felt shy, because I knew my past. I just answered them, "who says that I am strong? Without the Word, I have been destroyed".
In the past time, I had problem with someone and I was angry with God. I said that I did not believe God anymore.
But, God still helped me. On Sunday evening, God brought me to minister at Johor. Starting from the first song, my tears dripped because the first song at that time was "Jadikan Aku MuridMu" (make me Your disciple).
When the Word was preached, my tear kept on dripping. There was one word from Pastor Pong that I remembered until now. He said "if we have problem, it is not because Jesus is evil, but we are miser. We have been bought with expensive price, but we do not want to surrender our life to God".
Actually, at that event, I was not worthy to be helped by God. But now, God still gives me mercy so I can fix my mistake about whether I get angry with God again or not when I am against the bigger problem. And praise God, because of the Word that I hear many times, I am not angry to God at all, but I just give thanks to Him, that by this event God teaches me to be silent, calm, diligent, and patient. He also teaches me to keep my mouth, hope only in God, worship, and surrender to Him.
If I can go through all of this quietly like there is no incredible thing that happened in my senses, it is just God's helping, not my power.
I can work and minister like nothing happened to my senses. It is absolutely God's helping.
And now, there is a result that I can get, namely a cloud as small as a man's hand has happened in my life. I only hope God, who knows if today is the day of recovery from God. If it has not happen yet, I keep on hoping who knows if tomorrow God will recover me and so on. And that thing pushes me to keep on worshipping and hoping Goduntil the recovery happens in my life.
It is my testimony and I hope it can be blessing and may God's name be glorified.